(Satire)
Robert Redfield
Have you ever taken a trip to the grocery store, gym, or park and seen a white person? Have you seen a white person in your neighborhood or friend group? Do you read books or magazine articles and see white names printed across the pages?
Me too, and it’s a serious problem.
No matter where I go or what I’m doing, without fail, I either see or speak to a white person. Lately, more so than ever before, I’ve been considering one thing: why?
Why are white people still here? Why are there so many of them? Why do they still exist at all?
The answer, indubitably, is racism.
The reason that white people still exist, in any capacity aside from arbitrary genetic segments, is due to nothing more than strict, hateful, primogeniture racism and that cannot be denied any longer.
Consider for a moment the following:
White people have had exposure to PoC since before the Middle Ages. The Romans occupied and conquered parts of Africa and the Middle East, and Alexander the (white) Great did the same before them. Columbus landed in North America in 1492, and the Vikings landed in North America long before that. Why, after all that time, have white people not chosen to love and breed with PoC? It isn’t proximity — that’s clear. So, what is it if not racism?
After more than 2000 years of exposure, white people have still chosen to love and breed, primarily, with their own kind. They have made the conscious choice to follow their own evil, white hearts instead of doing the right thing and breeding with PoC to ensure that all people are PoC. The conscious choice to maintain white DNA is racist. Full stop.
See where this is going?
The very existence of white people is an act of supremacy and aggression. If white people were as ‘tolerant’ and ‘progressive’ as they claimed to be, they simply wouldn’t exist anymore. They would make it a priority to erase their hateful, oppressive pasts by erasing their hateful, oppressive selves. They’ve had more than 2000 years to prove that they are allies of PoC.
They’re not.
Genetic skin color can change within five generations. From white to PoC, the entire world could be racially equal in 150 years.
To ameliorate this disgusting human rights violation and offer all white supremacists — because all of them are white supremacists — a chance to assimilate, I offer this modest proposal:
1. Ban All Future White Breeding
In order to ensure the proliferation of PoC, we must first ban the next generation of white people. This can and should be done through legislation. However, because most of our government and many other governments are headed by white supremacists, this will have to be done through social activism and pressure. Social-dissenters will be publically shamed and ridiculed, canceled, or boycotted outright. In order to gain the social relevance necessary to exude such pressure, all instances of potential or perceived racism and discrimination must be acknowledged and atoned for on the world stage. This will be difficult and take many months, if not years. Don’t let that discourage you; we can and will gain legislative power. And when we do, this will on the top of the to-do list.
The very existence of white people is a threat to our existence, the first step in the social cleansing must an outright ban. That cannot be ignored any longer. White existence is white supremacy.
2. Dissolve All Current White Relationships
Following the ban on white children, we have to ban white relationships in general. This includes spouses, friends, colleagues, and families. Allowing white people to have close relationships also allows them to believe that those relationships are justified. After all, it was those very relationships that led to the torture and misfortune PoC have always had to face. Enabling white relationships enables white oppression. Allowing white relationships, in any capacity, only reinforces the supremacist mentality.
After the criminalization of white fraternization, all white relationships will be considered acts of terrorism against PoC. Because white people are so clearly dedicated to the preservation of their own race, they will protest and rally against this. Punishment for breaking the edicts of our new legal system is discussed further in part 5.
3. Re-educate All Current White Children
Because white children already exist (unfortunately), they need to be re-educated into the new world order. Instead of allowing them to grow up with the family units that only enable and reinforce their innate supremacy complexes, they will have to grow up in camps. The camps won’t teach white history, math, or science. Their education will begin with the year 1619 and lead up to the current social penance they now have the privilege of paying. While living at the camp, the whites will work and manufacture common goods that oppressed PoC have always been deprived of — clothing, food, and natural resources. Any currency ‘earned’’ by the adolescent white will be taken and redistributed to PoC as reparations.
At the age of 18, the white will be released with a unique tag and number for tracking/control purposes. This tag and number will dictate where the white can work, shop, live, and congregate. Following their upbringing in the camps, all future earnings/belongings will be partially redistributed as reparations. Though tempting to take all earnings/belongings as reparations, the cost associated with keeping the white alive and housed would be too great. That, however, is addressed in our final solution (yet to be published, though currently being revised).
4. Legislate All Future White Relationships
Because this group of white children will be the last, their relationships will be controlled by law. The children, both in the camp and after release, will not speak to, or form relationships with, one another. When/if a forgiving PoC chooses to tolerate the sexual company of those last few whites, it will be done completely on the PoC’s consent. Because part of the White Penance is breeding with PoC, they will not be given a choice — by law. The white will birth/inseminate and nothing more; PoC will not be raised with white parents.
All current whites will be forced to dissolve their relationships — discussed in part 2 — and will only take up new romantic partners/friends at the request of an interested PoC. Any act of charity, grace, or absolution on the white will not be tolerated. This is a penance that cannot be paid back, and thus must be enforced ad libitum. Though PoCs might feel the need to be kind or friendly to the white, we firmly stand against it. The white lives to destroy and undermind the PoC. There is no safe white.
5. Punish Apostates
Because there will always be rebels and dissenters, strict punitive measures will be put in place. If a white is caught fornicating, speaking, loving, or bonding with another white, to any degree, they will serve permanent penance in the re-education camps. Penance will include hard labor, the performance of menial tasks, and extended fasting. A white person charged with multiple offenses, or repeated offenses, will be publicly executed. Any hidden offspring resulting from the offending white will also be executed.
It is clear by the sheer volume of whites still in existence that this is the path we must follow. Whites seek the oppressive destruction of PoC at all costs — which is evidently clear by their very existence. They are not allies. They are not your friends. If the white actually cared, they would have done this themselves long ago.
White existence is white supremacy.
This is how we achieve complete inclusivity.
This is how we become equal.
Robert Redfield is a leading expert in everything. His education includes community college indoctrination, biased studies, and self-indulgent facts. Satire
